The Kuffar moment

For me, what I call the kuffar moment was a decisive moment. You have to know that for a long time I could hear them all day when I was at home, both in the first apartment we lived in and after we moved to a new apartment.

At the time I thought I was dealing with a group of people who had all ganged up against me. I didn't know if they were French people, Brazilians who spoke French, half-mafioso traffickers who had ganged up against me, etc.

My routine had been very difficult since 2021. I could hear French people provoking me almost constantly when I was at home. It was like having a bunch of busybodies around; I couldn't talk about something at home without hearing one of them react to what I was saying.

You have to know that the people I can hear all have their own personality and their own voice, and they use expressions that are particular to them.

As I said elsewhere on the site, it often sounds like they're talking to each other, or else addressing me directly.

David is sitting with his back to us at his computer in a narrow room, with a speech bubble asking: « Oh, is that the kuffar? »

Anyway, that day I remember being at home working on my PC, since I work remotely, and I could hear them « provoking » me and talking about me all day long.

Because at the time, and for a long time, I experienced it negatively, since to me it felt like a major invasion of my privacy.

And at one point, one of them whom I didn't hear very often said something like this while talking about me:

Oh, is that the kuffar?

In that moment, I wondered what it meant...

Screenshot of a conversation showing a question about the word « kufar », followed by an explanation of its meaning, then a question about the Arabic word « zarb »

So, as a good developer, what did I do? I asked ChatGPT what « kufar » meant, and it gave me what you can see above, in the screenshot of my conversation with ChatGPT(opens a new tab).

Basically, ChatGPT explained to me that it was a term for talking about an unbeliever or non-believer. After that I also asked ChatGPT what « zarb » meant, and it explained that it was Arabic slang for weird. Because I had already heard one of them say that about me in the past too, but I think that was in the old apartment.

And when I read that, since I genuinely thought it was a group of friends who had all ganged up against me, to the point of having colleagues in the neighborhood of our new apartment, I thought there were some North African guys in the group.

A blue-haired character, half-hidden behind a building

Anyway, after that I thought there were North African guys in the group too. At the time, in my head, I was carrying out a MEGA investigation, like the image you can see on the site's home page. I had hundreds of theories running in parallel, each of those theories also having sub-theories branching off from it.

I was trying to remember all the North African guys whose paths I might have crossed in my old building and in my current building since this whole story had started.

At that time, I don't think I was sure they could know what I was thinking at any given moment; I had my doubts. To me, they were young people and adults who were ultra-determined to intimidate me and make me lose it.

But since I could always hear them, I thought it sounded like a mind virus. Then I connected it to « woke mind virus », which some people repeat all the time, and from then on I jokingly thought this to provoke them:

You're blue-haired neo-Islamists!

In a bedroom, David is lying on the bed thinking, while a thought bubble shows several ideas

After that I spent almost a year regularly referring back to it, because for a long time I was convinced I was dealing with carefree young people, or even thugs or traffickers, who were trying to intimidate me but didn't dare speak to me face to face. So I provoked them, in the most ridiculous way, admittedly, trying to get them to come out.

I realize this may sound delusional, because we've been taught to see this as madness, as a « delusion », but I think it's a mistake to react that way. These people from the phenomenon really exist, and the complexity of their dialogue completely exceeds my brain's abilities.

While I was talking to them (just by thinking), I told them that one of them had made a blunder by calling me « kuffar », because I didn't know that word, and that since the kuffar moment I was finally 100% convinced that it couldn't be entirely internal, since I didn't know that word.

And actually, looking back, I realize that by calling me kuffar, he helped me! But it took me about a year to get it... It wasn't insignificant, because that's really the solution. As long as we don't accept that it's something completely beyond us, we never make progress, and I could have stayed that way my whole life, never understanding...

There aren't only North African guys among the people I can hear; I hear people who seem to be from every ethnic background.

At one point I even posted a message on a forum, back when I still thought I was dealing with a team of stalkers trying to intimidate me, saying that there were white people, North African guys, Black people, all united in trying to make me lose it.

Apparently, it had made them laugh.